


Unforgettable

by thereforebucket



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: F/F, I'll tag characters as they appear but no secondary ships, Witch AU, first chapter has some violence, the rest does not
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-30
Updated: 2017-03-23
Packaged: 2018-09-13 09:27:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 15,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9117712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thereforebucket/pseuds/thereforebucket
Summary: “What about you?” she asks Eli. “Do you have anyone special? A boyfriend?”Eli snorts, forgetting herself. “No,” she says.“A girlfriend?” Nozomi’s easy smile takes on an almost catlike quality and Eli finds her face heating up, just slightly.She shakes her head, smiling despite herself. “No,” she says, “not currently.”Nozomi grins at that and laughs, turning away. “Same.” Eli tucks that information away for later.-----Brought together by a bad situation, Nozomi and Eli find themselves fast friends, and time only serves to bring them closer. As feelings begin to blossom between them, it looks to Eli like nothing can stand in their way. The only trouble is: Nozomi’s a witch. Eli isn’t.With secrecy laws and secret feelings to navigate, the two have their work cut out for them. These months may not be easy, but they certainly are unforgettable.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This AU is really special to me because I developed the world for comic I'm writing with a friend. The comic is both unpublished and on hiatus, but I get to share this world with you through this fic!
> 
> Beta'd by tumblr user banditchika

It’s a warm night, though cooler than the stale heat of the subway platform below. Eli leaves the stairs and makes her way from pool to pool of streetlamp glow, one hand on her bag, another hooked through a belt loop.

She looks up at the clouds, the dingy orange of reflected light strangely comforting to a city girl like her. They cover the sky in a thick blanket and the breeze chooses that moment to pick up, blustery and full. It has its own character, threatening rain and Eli ponders this as another gust blows through her. The corners of her lips prick up and she indulges them, grinning with the wind at her back.

She imagines flying free and sees herself as a leaf on the breeze, surveying the city from above. She giggles, imagining herself tumbling through the air, flipping to see those orange clouds. She’s always wanted to fly, ever since she was a little girl in ballet. Those leaps and jumps above the crowd were the closest she ever got, and she reveled in them every— **  
**

An arm knocks her against the wall. Eli is jerked from her daydream by hands dragging her into an alley. She lets out a yell of fear and surprise and the hands slam her up against the alley wall by the lapels of her jacket.

“Don’t make a sound!” a male voice yells. He’s dressed all in black, a ski mask over his face. He takes a hand away and reaches for his pocket. Eli jerks free with a whimper and makes to kick him between the legs, but he jumps back in time and reveals the gun in his hand. He fumbles with it during the jump, but gets a good hold on it and brandishes it at Eli. She falters.

“Give me your wallet and your phone!” he yells.

Eli’s mind goes blank with terror. “Okay! Okay!” she says, frantically, hands flying to her purse. Tears prick her eyes. She pulls the purse off her shoulder, rips it open, and reaches in for her wallet.

“Throw it at my feet!” he says when she pulls it out, and she does, then reaches in again, pulling out her phone. “Set it down gently, then kick it over to me.” Eli crouches and sets her phone on the ground. She briefly considers kicking it at him hard and running away, but she sees the gun in his hand and her vision blurs with fear. Instead, she stands up and kicks the phone over to him with as much delicacy as she can muster. She’s openly crying now, which works against her as she tries desperately to keep a level head. “Anything else in there?” Eli fumbles with the bag again, trying to find anything else of value.

“Th-that’s all!” she says. She swipes a quick hand over her eyes to clear the tears away and looks at him, begging him to believe her.

“Empty it,” he tells her, gesturing with the gun, “pour it out.”

Voices, then footsteps, coming fast. Eli hears them, but they don’t register, not while this man is holding her at gunpoint, while she’s fumbling with the material of her bag, trying to flip it over, but they keep coming, louder and louder. Eli registers them just in time to look up and see a small pink blur stop and kick the man in the pelvis with surprising power.

The man is knocked clear over and the gun falls from his hand, clattering away on the brick. The assailant, a girl, runs over and kicks it away. When she turns back, she has what looks like a flaming knife in her hand. Eli rears her head back at the sight of it. Where did she get that? Why the hell is it flaming? She contemplates rushing forward and knocking it from her hands, but the girl doesn’t seem fazed, so Eli stays put.

The man is already back on his feet, and he throws a punch at this girl, who dodges. She brings her knife around as she rights herself, and the man jumps back. A safe distance apart, the two stand there for a moment, sizing each other up. Eli can see clearly now that the girl is in her mid-twenties, around her age, with black hair done up in high pigtails. Her face is set in a scowl that dares the man to make a wrong move. Eli glances behind her and sees that her back is to the man’s gun.

The man weighs his options, then makes to go to the girl’s left. She rushes to cut him off, but realizes too late that it was a feint as he turns and runs straight for Eli.

Eli almost trips over her feet trying to get away, but he never gets to her. Instead, the girl runs to stop him and he changes directions yet again, straight for the gun on the ground. He dives for it and the girl hesitates. Her knife disappears. Eli frowns at the spot it had been, alarmed. The girl glances over her shoulder and yells “Nozomi!”

Eli turns her head and sees that there is someone behind the girl. She doesn’t have time to make out the figure, though, before the girl shouts and jumps at her, pulling her down. Eli looks at the girl in confusion as a _BANG!_ fills the air and a white-hot pain slices across her right bicep. She seizes her hurt arm and has just enough time to piece together that she’s been shot before something big and glowing and purple roars past her, hitting the man in the chest and leaving him sprawled on the pavement.

The person, ‘Nozomi,’ rushes down the alley to meet them. As they gets closer, Eli can see that they’re another girl around her age. She’s taller than her friend and has long, dark hair that trails behind her in two low pigtails. “Are you alright?” she asks, falling to her knees. She holds out her arms in a steadying gesture.

The girl who jumped on Eli takes a ragged breath and punches her friend’s arm with slightly more force than necessary. Nozomi looks at her with concern.

“Nicocchi?” she asks.

“Nice…timing…Toujou,” the girl says, breathing heavily.

Nozomi snorts. “I cast it as fast as I could,” she says, gripping her friend’s shoulder gently.

The girl rolls her eyes. “I know.” She pushes herself up and pats Nozomi’s hand with hers, looking away. “Thanks.”

Nozomi smiles softly at her. “Anytime.” She turns to Eli. “And you?”

Eli’s mind is in such a fog that she looks at her and opens her mouth, but nothing comes out. She tries again, anxiety building. “I-I think…”

She looks down at her arm, at her hand, covered in red bl—her vision blurs, and she hears, as if far away, “Oh my god, Nicocchi, she’s hurt!”

Her friend looks up, then over in two sharp movements. “Oh my god,” she says, seeing the blood. Eli’s vision has cleared again, and the fog has been replaced by acute panic.

“I’ve been shot,” she manages to work out. Her arms tense up, which only makes the wound hurt more. Her breath comes in ragged gasps.

“Nicocchi, call 311,” Nozomi says. “I’ll see what I can do with the wound.”

“311?” Eli asks. Nozomi looks at the other girl, who is standing up. She shrugs distractedly, still shaken up.

“She won’t remember it,” she says, walking away quickly and pulling out her phone.

“I won’t remember?” Eli asks. “And what was that purple ball? Who are you?”

Nozomi takes a deep breath. “Well, I’m Nozomi, she’s Nico, and, well, what you saw was magic.”

Eli blinks. “M-magic?”

Nozomi nods, placing a steadying hand on Eli’s shoulder. “Breathe,” she says, and Eli does, closing her eyes. A wave of calm flows through her as she exhales. She blinks, feeling level-headed if nothing else.

Nozomi looks down at Eli’s arm. “311 is our 911,” she says, reaching forward. She tugs gently on Eli’s hand, trying to get a look at the wound. Eli slowly complies, wincing at the pain. “There you go,” Nozomi says softly. She examines the arm. “I think Nicocchi has a water bottle in her bag, I’ll be right back.” She stands and Eli raises her good arm to stop her.

“Wait, what actually happened?” Because it can’t be magic. Magic doesn’t exist.

Nozomi smiles softly. “I’ll be right back with the water.”

Eli settles back against the wall, resisting the urge to clutch her arm. She has to think practically about this, get her priorities straight. She looks at her arm, sees the red dripping down, and pulls her head away, feeling nauseous. Taking a deep breath, she gathers her courage and looks again.

A shallow gash around a centimeter wide glistens on her upper arm. Eli realizes there isn’t an entry wound, and when she turns around, she sees a divot in the wall and bullet on the ground. She lets out a shaky breath. Well that’s a bit of good luck. She thinks of her instrument and hopes this won’t affect her playing too much.

She’s got to find something clean to put on it to keep infection out. She thinks about the things in her purse. Nozomi’s getting water, and hopefully Nico’s water bottle is clean enough to wash away any dirt, but they should still sterilize it…

With a sense of dread, Eli realizes that she has hand sanitizer, which would do a very effective job. She shudders, deciding very quickly that she will see what Nozomi has before she pours raw hand sanitizer into her wound.

Eli looks up and sees Nozomi walking back toward her. Once again, the questions flood in. Magic? That’s impossible, right? How many times had she played witches with Alisa when she was little, how many fairy tales had their grandmother told them? Magic was for kids! It wasn’t real and it certainly didn’t go around saving women in alleys.

Nozomi sits down next to Eli, setting her and Nico’s bags down next to her. Eli’s mind works to find the words she needs to express her confusion, but try as she might, she can’t seem to pull together a sentence. Finally, she says, “So, magic?”

Nozomi doesn’t answer at first, instead reaching into a bag and pulling out a pink water bottle. Eli watches the water slosh back and forth inside, catching the light of the lamp across the street. “Hold out your arm,” Nozomi says. Eli does. She braces herself and a moment later feels the cool water pour over her arm. “I can’t tell you everything about magic, because it…won’t matter in the end.” Eli frowns. “But,” she continues, “I can tell you a little bit.” Eli listens silently, stilling her body to better hear Nozomi’s explanation.

“I don’t have a bandage,” Nozomi murmurs to herself, letting Eli’s arm go gently. She pulls a bag on her lap and starts rummaging through it.

“Magic, where to start. Nicocchi used some fire magic earlier, as you probably saw.” Eli closes her eyes and nods. So that’s why the knife was flaming. “You also saw my Spellcasting. That was that big ball of purple light that knocked that guy out.” Nozomi nods over to the man laying splayed on the brick. “But, magic is everywhere, hiding in plain sight. The flowers in my window do very well, though I don’t get much sun, because I use a little life magic on them. My mom would use a bit of fire magic to keep food warm for my dad because he always got home later than her. Ehh, these will have to do.”

Her hand emerges from the bag clutching a plastic band-aid holder. She pulls out one, eyeballs the width of the band-aid compared to the length of the wound, and pulls out three more. “I need something to dry your arm with,” she says, and Eli’s head snaps up.

“Oh,” she says, “just…” she leans her shoulder down so her arm is closer to her hip, then takes the hem of her shirt in her other hand and wipes at the skin around the wound. “This shirt is ruined anyway,” she says, shrugging.

Nozomi smiles. “That works,” she says. She lays the band-aids across the wound and within seconds they are soaked through. “This is more to have a clean material in contact with the wound. We need to wrap it in something too.” She looks around. “Hey, Nicocchi,” she calls. Nico is standing by the unconscious man, poking him with the toe of her shoe.

“Yeah?” she calls back.

“Can I use your sweater?”

Nico looks up, suspicious. “Why?”

“I need to wrap Eli’s arm with something.”

“ABSOLUTELY NOT.”

“You’re the only one with extra clothes!”

“STEAL THIS GUY’S SHIRT! OR HIS MASK! I DON’T CARE, BUT YOU’RE NOT TOUCHING MY CARDIGAN.”

There’s a siren around the corner of the long end of the alley, and a moment later they’re bathed in flashing red and blue light. Nozomi and Nico stop their bickering to watch. A police car pulls up, parks, and a dark-haired woman steps out. She scans the scene, then starts over toward Eli. As she walks, she points at Nico. “I’m going to get to you in a moment, don’t go anywhere.”

She kneels in front of Eli. “Hello, my name is Detective Sonoda. I was informed that a man attacked you. Do you mind answering a few questions while I tend to your wound?”

Eli nods. Nozomi, though, leans back and smiles. “Hello, Umi,” she says.

Detective Sonoda startles. “Nozomi,” she says, blinking. “What are you doing here?” Realization dawns on her face. “You—”

“Stopped a mugging and knocked the guy out. It was a clean shot, and no one saw but this woman, the man, and Nico. You’ve got nothing to worry about.”

The detective nods, taking a deep breath. “That sounds like it will hold up against the Order,” she says. “If Nico used magic too, then we’ll have to take you both in for questioning, and there will be a trial, but I don’t think you have anything to worry about.”

Nozomi nods. “Thanks, Umi.” Detective Sonoda briefly claps her on the shoulder.

“Alright,” she says, turning to Eli, “I’ll be right back with the first aid kit.”

As she heads to her car, Eli turns to Nozomi. “She’s a magician too?”

Nozomi’s face contorts as she tries to hide a smile.

“What?” Eli asks.

Nozomi shakes her head. “Nothing, just, ‘magician?’” She stifles a giggle and Eli finds herself smiling too.

“That’s the word, right?” she asks. Her voice rises in defense and she starts to laugh.

“No!” Nozomi says, shaking her head. “Magicians are performers! You know, ‘pick a card, any card?’”  
  
“So what word do you use?” Eli asks. If it weren’t for flashing lights of the police car or the pain in her arm, this would feel just like two friends hanging out.

Nozomi shrugs. “It varies. Some people say ‘witch’ or ‘wizard,’ some people say ‘mage,’ it just depends.” She laughs again and looks away. Eli feels inordinately pleased with herself. “But yes,” Nozomi says, “Umi is a witch with the Order of Secrecy, which, as the name suggests, is there to keep magic a secret. I’ve known her since high school.”

Eli frowns. “I thought she was an officer.”

“Well, she’s both.” Nozomi tilts her head to the side and shrugs. “She’s a regular detective, but she’s also sent to deal with magic incidents because she’s a witch.”

Eli nods. “That makes sense.”

Detective Sonoda returns and Nozomi stands and moves out of the way. The detective opens the first aid kit and starts working on Eli’s arm with ease and efficiency. “So, what’s your name?” she asks. Eli’s unsure if she’s making conversation or taking a statement, but she answers her.

“Eli Ayase.”

“Well, Eli Ayase, do you mind telling me what happened here?”

Eli does, and when she gets to the point where Nico and Nozomi got involved, she looks to Nozomi to see how she should explain it.

“Nicocchi used some fire magic,” she says. “I used Spellcasting for one spell that hit him in the chest and knocked him out.”

“In the chest?” The detective’s eyebrows shoot up and her eyes pierce Nozomi like a hawk.

Nozomi waves her off. “I made sure it wouldn’t kill him, Umi, you don’t have to look at me like that.”

“He’s still breathing!” Nico calls from behind them. Nozomi gives her a discreet thumbs up.

Detective Sonoda sighs. “Alright, I believe you, but you know as well as I do how dangerous Spellcasting is when it goes wrong.”

Detective Sonoda asks them to go over the events with more detail and once she finishes and once she finishes bandaging Eli up she writes it all down. Afterwards, she gets up to take Nico’s statement.

Using her good arm and the wall, Eli pushes herself to her feet. Nozomi puts her arms out to help, but Eli shakes her head. “I’ve got it,” she tells her.

“Alright.” Nozomi holds her hands up defensively then folds them across her chest, smiling.

Eli turns to her once she’s standing up. “Hey, are you going to get in trouble for helping me?” she asks, concernedly.

Nozomi shakes her head. “No, not likely,” she says, “but we will have to go in for a trial. You weren’t really supposed to see all of that, and that guy over there probably wasn’t either.” She winks, and Eli smiles a little.

“Well, thank you for stepping in,” she says, resting a hand on Nozomi’s arm. She pulls it back with a start once she realizes there was still a little blood on it. “Oh god, I’m sorry,” she says apologetically.

Nozomi looks down and shrugs. “Ehh, it’ll wash off.” She looks back up at Eli and holds her gaze. “And of course we’d step in. You were in a bad situation and we could help. Simple as that.”

More lights flood the alley and the two of them look up to see another squad car pull up. The officer inside gets out and talks to Detective Sonoda for a bit before gathering up the still-unconscious man and taking him away.

When she is done with Nico, Detective Sonoda walks back over and offers Eli a ride to the hospital, saying that she did the best she could with her arm, but it would be more effective to have it checked by a doctor or nurse. Eli accepts and begins to gather her things. When she’s done, she looks around for Nozomi, and is disappointed when she realizes she can’t find her. She wanted to thank her again for how much she had done for her. Nico, she finds talking to Detective Sonoda.

She places her right hand lightly on Nico’s arm and winces, forgetting that that was her hurt arm.

“Excuse me,” she says. “Where did Nozomi go? I wanted to thank her again.”

Nico points to the squad car, and Eli is surprised to see Nozomi is already inside. Nozomi grins at the shock on her face and Eli finds herself blushing slightly. “Oh,” she says, confused. “But didn’t Detective Sonoda already take her statement?”

Nico rolls her eyes, though not unkindly. “We’re coming with you, you knucklehead. You shouldn’t be alone right now.” She catches herself and reddens slightly. “At least, that’s what Nozomi thinks.”

Detective Sonoda nods. “Nico’s right. You’ve been through a lot, and if you really don’t have many contacts here in the city, then having these two with you might make tonight go a little smoother.” She seems to think of something and starts, dismayed. “I can vouch for them, of course. I’ve known them since we were children and they are both fine women of upstanding character.” Beside Eli, Nico snorts. “What?” the detective asks defensively. She crosses her arms and scowls at Nico.

“You’re just—” Nico shakes her head, laughing, “—you’re too good, Umi.”

Detective Sonoda wrinkles her brow in confusion, looking more lost than angry now. “What’s that supposed to mean?” she asks.

Nico waves her off. “Nothing. I’m telling Nozomi what you said.”

Detective Sonoda shakes her head. “I don’t understand you,” she says, more to herself than to Nico. She starts walking to the car, and Eli takes it as her cue to follow her, gripping the straps of her purse tightly. She trusts these women, she thinks, or at least trusts them to help her. Right? Doubt seeps into her mind. It’s just, she doesn’t really _know_ these women, but one of them is a police officer and the other two stopped their busy evening to save her from this situation, and, well, Eli guesses that she does trust them, at least a little bit.

It doesn’t stop her from being nervous, though. They all know each other… Eli figures this will be an awkward ride to the hospital for her. Which. It would be already. Because she’s riding to the hospital. In the back of a squad car. After getting shot. Well, grazed. And—

She’s slowed so much that Nico bumps into her from behind. Eli jumps, a jolt of panic running down her spine. “Sorry!” she says, turning around. Nico gives her a strange look.

“It’s alright,” she says slowly. Eli sees her mouth open slightly, like she’s going to say something more, and then she shakes her head, almost imperceptibly. “Let’s just…get to the car?”

Eli nods stiffly. God, her confidence is really shaken right now. She hates it, now that she’s realized it. She hates the way she feels uncomfortable in her own skin. Every bright light and sound grates on her nerves like this and it’s all she can do to keep it together.

She opens the car door, reveling in the satisfying feeling of the click, and shakes her head. Wow, it’s going to take a lot to get her out of her head now. She hopes she can hold out until she’s able to go home.

Eli slides in and is greeted by Nozomi, who smiles reassuringly at her. Nozomi is seated in the middle, with Eli to her left, behind the driver. A moment later, Nico opens the door on the passenger side and slides in on Nozomi’s other side.

It’s the perfect seat, Eli realizes. She has the door to scoot over to, should contact with strangers become uncomfortable, she can’t see Detective Sonoda, who, for all her efficiency, intimidates her a little, and she’s has a buffer between her and Nico, which is comforting. Nico hasn’t proven herself to be hostile, but she’s a little abrasive, and abrasive is the last thing Eli needs right now.

“Hey, Nozomi, listen to what Umi said,” Nico says across the car. Nozomi turns to her and Eli tunes them out. She shuts the door and buckles her seatbelt, resting her good arm on the windowsill.

It smells weird back here, which Detective Sonoda apologizes for. Something acrid lingers in the air and Eli wonders how the detective can stand to drive in this car. Eli tries breathing through her mouth, but she can still smell it, and it’s somehow worse that way, so she gives it up and goes back to breathing through her nose.

She catches a whiff of something fruity with, she decides, a hint of spice. The smell is much more enticing than what she thinks is vomit, and she subtly tries to figure out where it is coming from. She realizes, after a few moments of shifting and sniffing, that Nozomi is the source of the smell. She should ask her what perfume she uses, Eli thinks, then decides she doesn’t feel confident enough to navigate the implication that she was smelling this woman she barely knows.

The ride to the hospital is largely uneventful after that. Nozomi will make light conversation, Eli will answer with short sentences, and Nico will keep the conversation going with chatter. Detective Sonoda mostly listens, unless Nozomi and Nico ask her how wedding planning is going. Eli tunes them out unless spoken to.

They arrive, finally, and Eli follows them into the reception area. Umi checks her in, explaining the situation. The receptionist seems to recognize her, which makes sense, but she also seems to recognize Nico, which Eli wonders at. She shrugs it off, though. Maybe she’s accident prone.

The receptionist hands her an in-patient form and a pen and Eli sits down to fill it out. Her arm only aches now, no longer a sharp pain, but it hurts enough that she’s conscious of it.

“I have to take this,” Detective Sonoda says, standing up and pointing to her phone. She answers it as she walks off. “Hi, Kotori,” Eli hears her say. All the rigidness fades from her as Kotori replies.

Nozomi leans over to her ear. “That’s her fiancée.” Eli looks back at her, surprised; she had assumed that the detective’s fiancée was a man.

She smiles a little to herself. “Cool,” she tells Nozomi.

“Nico’s known Umi since she was a kid,” Nozomi says, gesturing to her friend, who is absorbed in her phone. “I’ve known—”

Nico jumps up and yells “HA!” She turns to Nozomi and Eli. “I’ll be back,” she tells them, before walking quickly down the hall.

Nozomi rolls her eyes. “She’s probably going to go see Maki,” she tells Eli. “She’s a doctor here. Anyway, I’ve known Umi since high school. She and Kotori have liked each other since at least then, but it never fit right, there was always one thing or another holding them back. Since college, though, they’ve been, well, ‘going steady’ is the only phrase that comes to mind.” She chuckles. “It’s late.” Eli finds herself smiling too. “It’s quite the turnaround from school, and for the better, too.” Nozomi watches Detective Sonoda for a moment, smiling when her face lights up. “What about you?” she asks Eli, who starts, taken aback. “Do you have anyone special? A boyfriend?”

Eli snorts, forgetting herself. “No,” she says.

“A girlfriend?” Nozomi’s easy smile takes on an almost catlike quality and Eli finds her face heating up, just slightly.

She shakes her head, smiling despite herself. “No,” she says, “not currently.”

Nozomi grins at that and laughs, turning away. “Same.” Eli tucks that information away for later.

The conversation turns to work. What do they do? Eli is a violinist with the symphony.

(“Oh, your arm!” Nozomi exclaims.

“At least it’s my bow arm,” Eli tells her.)

Nozomi, it turns out, works part time at a bakery called Homura, (“You’ve got to try it,” she says. “It’s a Queen City staple.”) and part time as a fortune teller. Eli alternates between filling out her form and talking to Nozomi. She finds that she likes talking to her and hopes they can meet again after this ordeal of a night is over. She’s thinking of a way to ask for her number when they call her name.

A nurse leads her to a small hospital room and she is instructed to wait there for a Doctor Nishikino. Nozomi comes with her to wait, and Eli is glad to not be alone. She leans against the bed while Nozomi sits in a chair by the door with a wry smile on her face.

“Dr. Nishikino, huh?” Nozomi says. “That’s got to be Maki. Nico’s probably with her right now.”

Detective Sonoda joins them a moment later, and intercepts Dr. Nishikino at the door when she arrives. Nishikino has red hair, Eli sees, and seems to be about their age, if not a little younger. _Impressive,_ she thinks. She also seems to be in an irritable mood. Nico squeezes around the two women in the entrance, a satisfied smirk fixed on her face. Eli wonders what she said to make Nishikino so peeved.

Dr. Nishikino continues to scowl as she enters the room, but smooths it out as she approaches Eli. “Eli Ayase?” she asks.

“That’s me.”

Dr. Nishikino nods. “Detective Sonoda has told me what happened,” she says, professionally, if a little stiff. Maybe that’s just her style. “With your consent, I’m going to take the dressings off your arm so I can take a better look at the wound.”

“Please,” Eli says. “By all means.”

Dr. Nishikino glances around before she does it. Nozomi waves as she looks at her, but Nishikino doesn’t react. “I know it’s just your arm, but do you want me to clear the room?”

Eli thinks for a moment. She doesn’t really mind, she guesses. It’s actually a pretty nice to have people concerned about her in this city. “They can stay,” she says. Dr. Nishikino nods.

“Alright then.” She walks over to the cabinets on the side of the room and pulls a pair of rubber gloves out of a cardboard box. “No latex allergy,” she mumbles to herself, looking at Eli’s in-patient sheet. She walks over to Eli and pats the bed behind her. “Go ahead and sit up here.”

Eli tries to boost herself up, forgetting about her arm. She gasps and her arm gives out, which alleviates the pain but sends her back to the floor. Dr. Nishikino puts her hands out to steady her and hooks a step stool with her foot. “Here, use this,” she says. Eli does, and once she’s up, Dr. Nishikino starts to unwrap the bandages. “Nice job, Umi,” she says once she’s done. From the corner, Umi nods and thanks her.

Dr. Nishikino disinfects the wound, which stings, then looks closer. “This looks like a clean cut,” she says. “It’s deeper than most, but it’s not dirty.” She looks at Eli. “It’s going to be gross. A cut this deep won’t scab, not at first, and so to keep the dirt out it’s going to ooze. It’s manageable, just remember to change your dressings regularly. After a while, it will scab up, and it may or may not leave a scar.”

Eli wrinkles her nose, but nods.

“I know, I know.” Dr. Nishikino smiles sympathetically. She seems to remember something and straightens up, glancing over her shoulder to the women by the door. Eli looks and sees Nico turn her head quickly. Nozomi catches Eli’s eye and suppresses a grin. Eli ducks her head to hide her own grin and Dr. Nishikino clears her throat, gathering herself. “I’m going to redress your wound now. Please pay attention, because these are things you will have to do on your own.” Her brow furrows. “Or, well, do you live alone?”

“Yeah.” Eli nods.

“Then you will have to do this on your own,” Nishikino repeats. She walks Eli through the process, then steps back. “Does it feel too tight? Too loose?”

Eli shakes her head. “No, it feels fine.”

“Good,” she says. “Well, my work here is done, but I believe that Detective Sonoda wanted a few words with you privately.” She turns pointedly to Nozomi and Nico, who get up. Eli tries to catch Nozomi’s eyes, but Nozomi keeps her gaze trained on the floor. Eli frowns. They were getting along just fine before. Just as she leaves the room, Nozomi throws a glance back at her. In that instant, Eli sees the sadness in her eyes and is confused.. She wants to call out to her, ask her, _why, what’s wrong?_ but she slips out the door and Eli is left alone with Detective Sonoda.

There’s a hint of the same sadness in the detective’s eyes as well. The rest of her gaze is governed by the efficiency Eli noted earlier, and that combination chills Eli a little, though she can’t pinpoint why.

“What did you want with me, Detective?” she asks, a little unnerved. The detective schools her features into a mask of professionalism and puts on sympathetic smile.

“Just protocol, I’m afraid,” she says. “I need to ask what you saw earlier, magic-wise, and how much you know, for my report.”

Eli frowns. “I thought you already got that information.”

The detective hums. “I did, but I want to double-check. Protocol, and all that.”

“Ok,” says Eli uncertainly. “Well, Nozomi threw that ball of energy, and I think Nico had knives that were actually made of fire?” It sounds silly saying it out loud, and Eli blushes recounting it. “Nozomi also told me a little about magic.” Detective Sonoda nods. She jots it down in her notebook and when she finishes, she looks up.

“Is that all?” she asks Eli. “That was all the magic you saw?”

Eli nods. “Yes, I believe so.”

Detective Sonoda looks down and nods to herself, slipping the notebook and pen back in her pocket. “Alright then.” Her head shoots up and she snatches at the air, once, twice, three times, each in a different place. She brings her hands in to circle each other, as though tying something up.

It all happens very fast, and Eli only has time to say “What—” before Detective Sonoda flings both of her hands at her, fingers outstretched.

Eli blinks a long, slow blink, and when she opens her eyes, there stands Detective Sonoda, arms at her side. Eli frowns. “I’m sorry, Detective, did you need me for anything else?”

The detective shakes her head. “No, sorry for keeping you an extra minute, I just wanted to make sure I got your statement correct.

Eli nods. “Alright.” She slides off the bed and onto the footstool. “Then am I free to go?”

“Yes,” Detective Sonoda says. “I’ll walk you out to Dr. Nishikino and we can get you checked out.”

They walk to the door. Eli feels like her brain is itching, and try as she might she can’t scratch it.

“Everything alright?” Detective Sonoda asks her as she wrinkles her nose.

Eli nods. “Yeah,” she says, but the feeling is still there. She feels like maybe she’s forgotten something, and if she remembers it, the itch will go away.

When they reach the reception area, Eli looks around for Nozomi and Nico, but they are nowhere to be seen. She asks Dr. Nishikino where they are, and she relays that they left. Eli deflates. “I wanted to thank them again,” she says. She looks at Dr. Nishikino, then Detective Sonoda nervously. “Would it be unprofessional of you to give me a phone number or something so I can do that?” They look at each other. Dr. Nishikino bites her lip and Detective Sonoda purses hers. Nishikino tilts her head, as if to ask if it’s ok, and for a moment, Eli gets her hopes up. Just as quickly, though, Detective Sonoda shakes her head, and Eli nods, understanding.

“I’m sorry, Ms. Ayase,” the detective says apologetically.

“It’s ok, I get it. Could I maybe give you my number and you could ask if they wanted it?” Eli knows she’s pushing her luck, but she’s got to try. The detective’s face answers her question for her. Eli nods again, her shoulders rising in embarrassment. “I get it, makes sense.”

“Sorry,” Detective Sonoda says again. “I can pass the message along, though.”

“I’ll tell them too,” Dr. Nishikino says. “If that’s all, though, then let’s get you checked out of here.”

Detective Sonoda gives her a ride home once she’s checked out, and without Nico’s chatter and Nozomi’s smooth direction of conversation, the ride is long and awkward. Mostly, Eli just looks out the window at the rain that’s started to fall. Dimly, she remembers predicting this earlier, before, well, before everything else that has happened tonight.

Once in her apartment, Eli locks the door and collapses on the couch, exhausted. She should call Alisa. She should call her parents, grandparents. But she too tired. After a quick thought, she checks to see that the blood on her shirt is dry, and, seeing that it is, she rolls onto her good arm and closes her eyes.

Her last thought before falling asleep is of Nozomi: how they became fast friends, and how she’ll likely never see her again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I'm working on the next chapter, I promise you, but I have to see what kind of time I'll have to work on it once my job starts. 
> 
> For those of you worrying about the violence, I promise you that this is the last you'll see of it! From here on out it's just 'Feelings and Complications, the Musical.' I hope you're as excited for it as I am ;)


	2. Chapter 2

Eli wakes four hours later and sits bolt upright in bed.

 

Wait, she’s not in bed, this is her couch, and her arm is throbbing, and her shirt is sticking to her, and it’s  _ dark. _ It’s so dark. The night comes back to her in a flash and she fumbles for her phone for a bit of light, hands shaking. Her breath starts to come in ragged gasps and she’s got to find her phone, got to hit that button, got to—

 

Her hands close around it and she smashes the home button. Her face is illuminated by the glow and she notes the time. 4:38. She’s got to go back to sleep, she has to get up in the morning, she has work— With a bark of laughter she remembers her arm. She can’t go back to work tomorrow, she wouldn’t be able to play anything substantial.

 

The phone’s light isn’t enough, isn’t nearly enough. It’s an oasis in a desert and the relief starts to fade as soon as it had come. Her breathing becomes irregular, the darkness presses in, closer, closer…

 

Eli jumps up and lunges for the lamp, almost knocking it over in the process. Once it’s on, she looks around wildly for some validation of her fears. Maybe this was instinctual, maybe she was actually in danger.

 

The room is empty, save her furniture, and honestly that reveals the worst of her fears. She leans back against the wall and squeezes her eyes shut, pressing the heels of her hands against her eyelids.  _ God. _ She drags her hands down her face. Just. Wow. Eli laughs, snorts really. She kicked her fear of the dark back in high school, at least the worst of it, the kind that makes her…irrational.

 

She sighs. She should probably take stock of everything, figure out how bad this is, but, try as she might, she can’t get a grip on her feelings. It makes sense, she guesses, she’s not exactly at the top of her game right now. It’s 4:38 — well, probably later at this point. She got in around 12:15 and fell right to sleep, so she’s only had about four and a half hours of rest. Is she tired? She tries to gauge her  body. Yes, she is. Can she sleep? Again, she tries to gauge it, but that’s a harder question to answer. Maybe after a cup of tea. Taking a deep breath, Eli pushes off the wall. She glances down as she does so and sees the blood on her shirt. A shower and a change of clothes then too, she thinks, wrinkling her nose.

 

She trudges to her bathroom, flipping on lights on the way, and turns on the water to let it warm up. Eli shimmies out of her pants and gingerly takes off her shirt. Carefully, she unwraps the bandages on her arm and throws them in the trash. Once everything is off, she steps into the shower, wincing as the water hits her back.

 

It’s hotter than she usually likes it, but she doesn’t change the temperature. She lets the heat sink into her, enjoying the feeling, the pressure of the water hitting her head and shoulders. It does sting, though, as it hits her wound, so Eli holds her arm out awkwardly. She meant this to be a fast shower, get clean and get out, but she finds herself staring into space, holding her arm out as she thinks about what happened.

 

It’s almost too surreal to comprehend. She’d worried about something like that happening, of course, what woman hadn’t? But to have it happen to her, to have someone with a gun fucking mug her?  _ Her? _

 

And there was her little ‘red badge of courage’ to prove it. She’d read that book in high school, or was it middle school? On her own, in the library? It was short, she thinks, about the Civil War. The ‘Red Badge of Courage’ had turned out to be some euphemism for a bullet wound. She laughs, her face blank. The weirdest part of this whole thing is that it  _ wasn’t _ a war. There was no reason for this. She wasn’t a soldier, she was just walking home, looking at the clouds, minding her own business, and a man jumped out at her. Eli couldn’t be more detached from this city if she tried. There was no reason for this.

 

She figures that she should be upset, but it’s just so…ludicrous to her that this could happen. So unreal. And then she hears the gun again, feels the pavement hit her skin, Nico’s weight pressing on top of her, purple light…

 

She frowns. Purple light? Where had that come from?

 

Her arm stings and she realizes that she let it drop into the water again. Hissing, she lifts it out of the stream and inspects it. It’s a deep, angry red that threatens to overcome her every time she sees it. Eli feels nausea and looks away, grabbing the shampoo for something to do. She squeezes it into her good hand and lathers it into her hair, determined to think of anything but the wound on her arm and the night’s events.

 

Shower over, she towels off and after a moment’s consideration, pulls a wad of toilet paper from the roll and dabs gingerly around the bullet wound. With her arm mostly dry, she begins to rebandage her arm in the way Dr. Nishikino showed her. It stings a bit, on top of the constant dull throb, but she gets it bandaged up more or less correctly.

 

Eli doesn’t find herself going back to sleep after showering and making herself tea. Instead, she turns on all the lights in the living room and watches the sun rise from her couch. At exactly 6:30, the earliest she’s allowed to call, she phones her conductor to tell him she can’t come in today. She doesn’t exactly tell him what happened, just that she was in an accident, no, not a car accident, and that her arm needs time to heal. Her conductor sighs, but says he understands and tells her to get some rest. She thanks him and hangs up, then watches the sun rise for another hour.

 

At 7:30, she calls Alisa. The phone almost rings out before it’s picked up with a, “What’s up, Eli?”

 

Eli frowns. That’s not her sister. “Yukiho?” she asks.

 

“Yep!” God, her sister’s roommate is way too chipper for 7:30 on a Thursday, which is weird, considering it’s Yukiho…

 

“Can I, um, speak to Alisa please?”

 

“Hmm,” Yukiho muses. “Well, you could, but your sister is being a lazybones right n—”

 

There’s a scuffle on her end of the phone and then Eli faintly hears her sister say, “Give me that.” Yukiho laughs in the background. “Sorry, Eli,” Alisa says, “Yukiho was just leaving.”

 

Eli can hear the rueful playfulness in her sister’s voice and her lips quirk up when she hears Yukiho scoff. “Rude.”

 

Alisa waits a moment before speaking again, probably waiting for Yukiho to leave the room. “She likes to come in here and annoy me awake when I have early classes.” She chuckles. “So what’s up, Eli? You called so early.” She punctuates the end of that statement with a long yawn.

 

Whatever happiness she had felt slides away and Eli is left feeling…empty. “Oh, well, I—” A thought strikes her. “Hey, you don’t have a test today, do you? Is your class an 8 A.M.?”

 

“My class is at nine, and I have a quiz later,” she says. “Eli, what’s wrong? You sound…” She struggles for the word. “…off.”

 

Eli exhales, then laughs nervously. She doesn’t really know how to say it. “I, um, well.” She takes a deep breath, for courage as much as for voice. “I got mugged last night,” she says.

 

It’s a moment before Alisa responds. “What?!” she finally says, and Eli flinches because god, the last thing she wants to do is worry her sister. But, she needs to, she barely knows anyone here, she needs her family right now. “Eli, are you ok?” Alisa asks.

 

“I, um, got shot actually,” she hears a sharp intake of breath from the other end. “But it’s ok!” she covers. “It was just a graze! Nothing serious, the detective took me to the hospital and I might have a scar on my arm but, well, right now it just bleeds a lot.”

 

“Eli,” Alisa says, and Eli can hear tears in her voice. No. No, if Alisa cries, she’s going to cry, and—dammit. Tears prick at her eyes and Eli tries to smile, to reassure Alisa, even though she can’t see her.

 

“It’s ok, it’ll heal, and, um, these two girls, or, well, women, they’re my age, saved me.” She takes a deep breath, and the tears subside for now. “One of them kicked him, even though he had a gun, Alisa! And all she had was—” Eli frowns, trying to remember. “…a knife, I think. Nico. And then the other one knocked him out…” Her frown deepens. That’s right, that’s what she remembers, but something…

 

“Eli? What’s wrong?” Alisa asks. “Well, aside from, you know.” She sighs. “Geez.”

 

Eli shakes her head. “I’m ok, I just... Never—” she pauses for a split second. Alisa will pry if she says ‘Never mind.’ “Um, anyway. Uh, the other girl—woman, had a taser gun, you know? And it knocked him out and then they called…911?” Something feels off about that too. Maybe they had had a discussion about why they called 911. Wow, had she been that out of it? “Um, and then a detective came and they actually knew each other, the women and the detective, I mean. Funny coincidence. And then they cleaned me up a little and took me to the hospital, and they actually knew the doctor too.” She laughs a little. “They must get around.” Eli blanches. “I-I don’t mean like that!”

 

“It’s ok, Eli,” Alisa says. “Did anything else happen?”

 

“Well, the two women were gone when I got out, which I was a little sad about, because one of them, Nozomi? We were kind of getting to be friends. Also, I wanted to thank them.” She clears her throat. “But after that, I just went home.”

 

Alisa huffs. “I’m coming down there tomorrow afternoon.”

 

“Alisa,” Eli groans.

 

“No, you shouldn’t be alone right now!”

 

“Alisa, I’ll be fine, I just wanted to hear your voice, ok? You have schoolwork! It’s senior year!”

 

Alisa’s silent for a moment, and Eli cautiously hopes she’s won. “Fine,” Alisa concedes, “but the next time Yukiho goes back home, I’m coming with her.”

 

Eli nods. That’s fair, she guesses. “Alright, but please, don’t worry too much, I just wanted to talk to you, ok?”

 

“I gotcha,” Alisa says, sighing. They’re both quiet for a minute. “Hey Eli?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“If you need, me, please don’t hesitate to call, ok? Or text. And really, I’m willing to come down whenever you want me to. Or you could come up here, ok? Whatever you need.”

 

Eli smiles. “Thanks, Alisa.”

 

“Don’t keep it from me,” Alisa warns. “I know how stubborn you can get.”

 

“I won’t.” Eli laughs. She needed that.

 

“Is there anything I can do now?”

 

Eli thinks for a moment. She shrugs. “I dunno, tell me about your week?” Maybe the chatter will help.

 

“I can do that.” Alisa sounds relieved that she can help. She starts talking about how her week has gone, how the professors have already amped up homework a week into the semester, how Yukiho has been, how the cute cashier at the grocery store must have graduated, and on and on for an hour as she gets ready for school. Eli feels herself relax. It’s soothing,  At about 8:30, Alisa pauses. “Eli, I have to go to class now. Do you want me to call you tonight?”

 

Eli thinks. “I don’t know,” she says slowly. “Do you have a test tomorrow?”

 

Alisa sighs. “Eli, I can always make time to talk to you, ok? And no, I don’t have a test tomorrow.”

 

“Then, I’ll keep you posted?” she says. “I’m not sure yet, it might be nice to hear from you, but I might need some time to myself.”

 

“I get that,” says Alisa.

 

“There is one thing I kind of want you to do, though.”

 

“Sure, what is it?”

 

Eli hesitates. “Um, could you call mom and dad? And Babushka? I want them to know, but I don’t know if I can deal with talking about it to them.”

 

“I can do that,” Alisa says, “but you know they’re just going to call you right afterwards.”

 

“I know.” Eli nods. “I just… Letting them get out the worst of their shock would be nice. And I also don’t really want to say the words again yet.”

 

“That’s fine.” There’s a lull for a moment before Alisa starts speaking again. “I’ll text you this evening, ok? Just tell me if you want to talk, and if not, I’m out of your hair.”

 

“Ok,” Eli says. “Thanks, Alisa.”

 

“No problem,” Alisa says. “But I gotta go now. Bye! I love you!”

 

“Love you too,” Eli says. “Bye.” She hangs up the phone with a smile and just sits there for a moment. Thank the heavens for Alisa, really, she thinks. The room is still and content and she just lets herself  be. She can actually start her day now, she feels.

 

With some effort, she gets to her feet. She’s sore, probably from being tackled by Nico right before she got sh—

 

No, nope. Eli pushes that vivid and awful memory away. She did get tackled, though, she can start with that. She remembers Nico’s arms seizing her and pulling her down and then it’s just the noise and the pain searing across her arm and something… Eli frowns. What had happened then? Nozomi… tazed the guy, right? Not that she had seen it all that well, seeing as she was still reeling from the, well, that  _ thing _ that she won’t say — think? — but it’s just that she remembers thinking it was so much clearer… Heat of the moment, she guesses, when the adrenaline’s high and every second is sharp.

 

She shakes her head to clear the images and realizes that her hands are tense, as is the rest of her body. It actually scares her a little bit, and she works to relax, bit by bit. God, she wishes someone were there with her. She… Doesn’t want to go through this alone.

 

Eli feels tears start to burn and tries to swallow them down. Self pity will get her nowhere.

 

But she isn’t doing this alone! She stands up, wiping her eyes on her sleeve in one swift motion. She’s got Alisa and the rest of her family in her corner. Well. She will, once Alisa tells them. But she has a network! A support system!

 

_ And none of them are here. _ The thought springs up, unbidden, and the tears spring to her eyes. This time, she lets them flow for a moment, screws up her face and folds in on herself. She’s struck, as always, by how involuntary crying is, how you can convince yourself that you’re fine and at the same time feel your face contort with emotion. It’s frightening in some regards and in others it feels… False. But if it’s so involuntary, how could it be false?

 

She feels a wave of homesickness wash over her and puts the debate aside. It’s always good to talk to Alisa, but it’s even better to have her sister in the room with her, to be hugged by her. She misses her Babushka too. Eli thinks of her house filled with old furniture, the kitchen where she taught Eli to make bread, how  _ proud _ her Babushka is of her, whatever she does, and she sits back on the couch and just lets herself sink into the sadness.

 

God she  _ misses _ them. Maybe it was a mistake to come here all alone. Because who does she know in Queen City? Hanayo, she guesses, and she knows Yukiho’s from here too. Alisa gave her Yukiho’s sister’s number when she came here, but beyond a few texts they’ve never met. She considers texting her now, but decides against it. She’s not going to call a total stranger and unload, no matter how close their sisters are. God, Alisa knows more people in this city than she does. She guesses it makes sense. Eli’s retreated into work, practicing, and watching Netflix. Alisa’s bright and bubbly and even if she’s only visited the city a few time there’s no doubt that she’s won over Yukiho’s family and probably friends, too. Eli can barely make friends with her stand partner. Granted, he’s a middle aged man with three kids and Eli’s only a few years out of college, but still, she’s been sitting next to him for a month. Alisa would have made friends with him by now.

 

Nope, that’s not fair, she can’t compare herself to her sister. They’re both good at different things, and Eli’s sure there are things that Alisa wishes she did like her. She stands up again, forcefully, and wipes her eyes on her sleeve. She has to get out of this apartment if she wants this day to be any semblance of normal. Getting up, she splashes cold water on her face before getting dressed. She debates whether or not to cover her bandages. She doesn’t really want people staring at her, but at the same time, it’s  _ August. _ In the end, she decides to pull on a windbreaker and heads out the door.

 

There’s this feeling of unease that hits her as soon as her door clicks shut. Her fingers fumble with her keys as she locks the door and there’s a chill that runs up her spine when she hears footsteps behind her. She turns the lock, pulls her keys out with a  _ snik! _ and whips around to find the neighbor’s four year old staring at her. He looks startled, like maybe her turning around so fast freaked him out a bit. She smiles weakly at him, hoping he won’t cry. He just continues to look at her, unsure of what to do. His dad walks up behind him and puts a hand on his back. He looks confused and the last thing Eli needs is a parent yelling at her about scaring their kid, especially a male parent, so she just waves, says, “Hi,” and walks away as quickly as is polite.

 

“Daddy,” she hears the kid say, about to ask a question, and his father shushes him. Eli hunches her shoulders up and pushes the button for the elevator. She risks a glance down the hall and sees that the man and his son are headed her way. She makes eye contact with the man, and nods before all but bolting for the stairs.

 

She’s nine floors up, but it’s a small price to pay for avoiding contact, at least today. Considering circumstances, though Eli figures she can cut herself some slack.

 

By the time she gets downstairs, the man and his son are long gone and Eli thanks her lucky stars. She doesn’t know the man’s name, though she thinks his son is named Sam.

 

Eli leaves her building and starts heading for the subway station. Maybe she should get something to defend herself with too. Her parents gave her pepper spray in college, but she misplaced it and  never bothered to get more. What are some other options? She’s seen women with these sharp charms on their key rings that look like cats, maybe she could try to find one of those. Nico had a knife on her, but…that seems a bit much. Besides, she’s not sure it’s even legal to have a knife that size just on you at all times, at least in the city. She’s not complaining about Nico, but she doesn’t really want one for herself. Nozomi had a taser though, and it worked well enough for her. Eli snorts a little. It certainly did work well enough for Nozomi, and Eli is grateful for it.

 

Nozomi. Eli feels that disappointment of not getting to say goodbye wash over her again. Finally, she makes a friend in the city and it’s a woman she’ll never see again. It had been really nice to talk to someone around her age again who really seemed to…get her? She guesses that’s not really fair to Hanayo. Hanayo’s nice enough and Eli likes talking to her, it’s just that after a certain point, they hit a wall. Polite silence fills the space between them and one or both of them finds an excuse to head out. Nozomi, though, she felt like she could talk to for hours.

 

Eli’s face grows red. That phrasing… well, she’s romanticizing it anyway.  _ Just let it go, _ she tells herself. But should she try to downplay such a nice memory? It was good to finally talk to someone again.

 

Eli doesn’t realize where she is until she glances down the alley. As soon as she does, she freezes. She sees the bricks, wreathed in shadows even in the daytime, and her blood runs cold. Oh god. She’s going to be sick. She can see red and blue flash off the walls, the man lying on his back in the middle of it, feels a sharp pain in her arm even though it’s clear now, all daylight and dumpsters, nothing to be afraid of.

 

And yet.

 

Eli forces herself to look away and sprints down the block. People probably look at her, but she doesn’t care, she just needs to get away from there, and as fast as possible. She catches the last five seconds of the crossing light at the corner and sprints across with a second to spare. She starts to slow down only when she gets to the entrance to the subway station.

 

Breathing hard, her comes to a stop. There are lots of people around, and there are safety in numbers, she reasons. Her lungs are on fire, and she bends down, hands on her knees, trying to catch her breath.

 

Fuck, she’s got to find a different route.

 

After a long moment, she stands up again, taking a deep breath. She lets it out slow and wills herself to calm down before walking down the stairs. She swipes her metro pass in the terminal and pushes through towards the platform.

 

The rest of her tip is uneventful. She reaches her stop and makes her way up to the Target on the surface. She wanders around, picking up night lights and pepper spray as she finds them, and stays in Target for as long as someone can without losing their sense of reality. On a whim, she picks up a movie from the checkout line. She figures it will give her something to do later. Eli pays, leaves, and heads for the subway.

 

It’s just her luck that her mother calls her as she’s emerging from the platform.

 

“Eli?” she asks, frantic.

 

Eli winces. “Hey mom,” she says, steeling herself for this conversation.

 

“Are you ok? Alisa just called me.”

 

“I’m… I’m alright, mom.”

 

There’s a pause on the other end of the line. “Are you sure?” her mother asks. “You don’t sound too alright.” She’s gentle, and really Eli wants nothing more than for her mother to be here, with her, but she doesn’t think she can talk about this right now. Not twice in one day. That’s why she had Alisa call her parents and Babushka.

 

Eli feels her chest tighten up. She wants her mother. She wants to be comforted. She just doesn’t want to talk about what happened.

 

“Do you want to talk about it?” her mother asks over the phone. Eli snorts. It’s like her mom read her mind.

 

“No,” she says. “I really don’t, not right now.” She hesitates, and when she speaks, the words come out haltingly. “Could you just, I don’t know, talk about your week? How’s dad? How’s work?”

 

Her mother hums a little. “Of course,” she says.

 

She keeps Eli company on her walk home, which is longer than usual because she’s going out of her way to avoid that alley. When her mom finally does say goodbye, Eli’s been home for half an hour and is feeling much better.

 

“Thanks for calling, Mom.”

 

“Any time, baby. And feel free to call me whenever you need to, ok? Any time of day.”

 

“Ok, mom, I’ll remember that.”

 

“Don’t hesitate.”

 

Eli chuckles. “Ok mom.”

 

“I love you, baby.”

 

“Love you too mom.”

 

“Bye!”

 

“Bye.”

 

Eli sighs, content, as her mom hangs up. As apprehensive as she was when she got the call, it was good to talk to her mother.

 

She yawns and realizes how tired she is. It makes sense, she only got like four hours of restless sleep last night. She almost stretches out right there on the couch, but figures it might be nice to sleep in her actual bed after last night.

 

Getting up and trudging to her room, she checks off a mental list of things to make sure she’s done before going to sleep. She plugged in all the night lights while talking to her mom, so if it’s dark when she wakes up she’ll at least have that small amount of light. She’s also got to change out of her clothes. Beyond that, she can’t think of anything else, so after she changes into a pair of pajamas, she climbs into bed and is asleep in a matter of minutes.

* * *

 

The rest of the week passes in a similar fashion. Eli sleeps restlessly, waking up in a cold sweat more than once, and then falls into a longer, dreamless sleep when her body reaches a certain level of exhaustion. She stays inside for a few days, living off ramen and eggs and Netflix and when she feels cooped up, she goes out on the fire escape and noodles around on the violin. She can’t play anything too fast yet because it puts a strain on her arm, but she can play a little and it keeps her from going crazy.

 

A few days into her self-imposed solitude, however, she realizes she can’t take it anymore and leaves her apartment to go to the coffee shop down the road.

 

It’s a lonely affair. She sits by herself in this large room, surrounded by empty tables and chairs on a weekday. She nurses a coffee, which she bought more so she could sit in this shop than because she needed caffeine, and already the jitters are setting in.

 

She gets the text just as she thinks she’s been in here too long, that this is feeling too much like home in that she’s still sitting alone scrolling through Facebook with nothing to do.

 

(3:32) Honoka Kousaka: Hi Eli! This is Honoka, Yukiho’s sister!

 

Eli stares at her phone. Huh. She hasn’t talked to Honoka since she moved here. She recalls that they started to make plans but never followed through.

 

(3:33) Honoka Kousaka: Yuki reminded me you were in the city so I thought I’d say hi!

 

Eli feels a smile creep across her face. It’s a good feeling to be remembered by someone, especially when you don’t really know anyone. She taps on the message and types a response.

 

(3:33) Eli Ayase: Hey Honoka! How are you?

(3:33) Honoka Kousaka: I’m good! I just got off work :)

(3:34) Honoka Kousaka: How are you?

(3:34) Honoka Kousaka: Yukiho told me you were going through kind of a hard time. :(

(3:34) Honoka Kousaka: (don’t worry though, no details :) )

 

Eli bites her lip. It makes sense that Yukiho would know what happened, or at least that something had happened, what with how close she and Alisa are. She isn’t sure how she feels, though, about Honoka knowing as much. On the other hand, she guesses that Honoka doesn’t know as much, as evidenced by her last message. It is good to have someone checking in on her too… She takes a deep breath and texts back.

 

(3:35) Eli Ayase: Ahh, yeah, things have been kind of not great this past week…

(3:35) Eli Ayase: But things are getting better day by day

(3:35) Eli Ayase: I’ll be fine soon.

 

She’s actually not sure about that. She still isn’t sleeping well and she doesn’t even like to have her window open at night, not to mention her fear of the dark coming back. But, she isn’t going to unload on a total stranger, no matter how kind they are.

 

(3:35) Honoka Kousaka: That’s good to hear!

(3:36) Honoka Kousaka: Hey, I know we started to make plans when you first moved to town

(3:36) Honoka Kousaka: Do you want to get lunch next week? :)

(3:36) Honoka Kousaka: (I’d say this week but I’m really busy all this week >.<)

 

Eli grins. She doesn’t have plans very often, so she’s excited as she types out this message.

 

(3:36) Eli Ayase: Sure!

(3:37) Eli Ayase: Any day in particular work for you?

(3:37) Honoka Kousaka: Hmmm

(3:37) Honoka Kousaka: Does Wednesday sound good?

(3:37) Eli Ayase: I’m free all week! Wednesday sounds great!

(3:38) Honoka Kousaka: Awesome!!

(3:38) Honoka Kousaka: Where do you want to go?

 

Eli pauses. She still doesn’t really know restaurants around here.

 

(3:39) Eli Ayase: Well, I’m still kind of new to the area

(3:39) Eli Ayase: I wouldn’t really know where to go

 

She bites her lip again, somewhat apprehensive, like she’s disappointing this woman or something.

 

(3:40) Honoka Kousaka: That’s fine! :)

(3:40) Honoka Kousaka: What kind of food do you like?

 

They spend the next few minutes narrowing places down until they decide to meet at soup and sandwich place that Honoka assures her has great desserts.

 

(3:48) Honoka Kousaka: I should know

(3:48) Honoka Kousaka: I’m a baker :P

 

Eli laughs at that and realizes how much brighter everything feels now that she has something to look forward to. She smiles to herself. She has this really sappy happy feeling right now and she isn’t even embarrassed by it.

 

(3:49) Honoka Kousaka: So, see you then?

 

Eli starts, realizing she didn’t reply.

 

(3:49) Eli Ayase: See you then!

 

She wishes their conversation could have gone on a little longer, but she gathers that Honoka is a busy person.

 

With that, she decides she’s been in this coffee shop long enough and pushes back her chair. She stands up, puts her empty mug in the dish bin, and walks out.

* * *

 

It’s a few days later that Eli decides she’s well enough to go back to work. She calls the conductor in the morning to let him know she’ll be back, then spends the rest of the day in a nervous state. The rehearsal starts at five this evening and ends at nine because of an event being held in the music hall which means it’s going to be dark when she gets off the subway. It’s only been a week since the incident; Eli’s a little worried about how she’s going to handle walking home. 

 

The late rehearsal time means the Eli also has a whole day to kill. She spends a few hours practicing, making sure she’ll be able to keep up in rehearsal, does laundry, dishes, cleans the bathroom, anything to keep herself busy. At four, she gathers up her purse, violin, and sheet music and heads out the door.

 

Eli gets there around 4:45 and quietly starts to set up. People are milling around, talking with friends, and generally ignoring her, which Eli is fine with because she really doesn’t want to answer a lot of questions right now. She’s just pulling out her sheet music when she catches a mop of curly blonde hair weaving its way through the stands. Her heart sinks and she chances a glance up over the stand to see the person’s trajectory. It’s a mistake, as it turns out, because she ends up looking directly into the eyes of the woman, Midori, who grins and waves. Eli ducks behind the stand, busying herself with something, anything.

 

Maybe Midori is just on her way to someone else. She doesn’t usually come over this way, if Eli remembers correctly she’s usually over in her own section or with the brass, but it’s always possible! Eli rifles through her sheet music for something to correct, but she can’t focus on anything as she waits for—

 

“Eli! Hey!”

 

She winces and looks up to see Midori a few stands away, smile on her face, and Eli puts up a weak replica in response. “Hey Midori,” she says. It really isn’t that she doesn’t like the girl, it’s just that she’s, well, a little nosy. She’ll definitely want to know why Eli wasn’t in rehearsal and Eli had mostly banked on the idea that no one would even notice she was gone but maybe her stand partner and Hanayo, so she doesn’t have a convenient lie.

 

“You haven’t been at practice for about a week,” Midori says, tilting her head. “Are you alright?” She’s parked herself almost toe to toe with Eli, who scoots back subtly in her chair, trying to create more distance between them.

 

“I, um, I was sick?” she offers. She doesn’t mean to make it a question, but it’s an on the spot lie and she’s almost comically bad at those.

 

Midori buys it, however, and sticks out her bottom lip in sympathy. “Oh, poor thing, being sick for so long!” Eli nods a little too fast. “Was it the flu?” Midori asks. “Is that why you’re wearing such a big sweater?”

 

Eli had put on the bulkiest sweater she owned that she wouldn’t die of heat exhaustion in to hide the bandages on her arm. Midori is wearing a sundress. Eli laughs nervously, her hands unconsciously coming up to grip her elbows. “Oh, um, no, I just get cold on stage sometimes.” Midori nods, satisfied.

 

“That makes sense,” she says. She looks down at the her bare arms and laughs. “I guess I don’t get cold as easily as you!”

 

“Haha, I guess not!” Eli says. Her inner self snorts unappreciatively. Her grandmother is from Russia, and Eli herself loves the snow. She reaches down for her case and pulls it onto her lap. “I’m sorry to cut this short, but I kind of need to tune my violin.” She smiles apologetically, her fingers ghosting the center clasp on her case.

 

Midori throws her hands up in surrender. “Of course! Of course! Don’t let me stop you!” Eli nods at her, making her eyes as earnest as she can. Midori rests a hand on Eli’s stand and smiles at her. “I’m glad you’re feeling better, Eli.” With that, she turns on her heel and weaves her way back through the stands. Eli lets out a quiet sigh of relief. Midori really is the nicest person, it’s just that Eli’s still finding her footing here. She opens her case and pulls out her violin to tune it.

 

A few other people come up to her both before and after rehearsal to ask where she’d been and offer their congratulations on her safe return. Her stand partner drops into his seat beside her and grips her shoulder with a “Welcome back,” and a smile. Her conductor nods to her when he walks onto the stage. Hanayo catches her after rehearsal and talks with her for a bit while she packs up. Eli cuts that conversation short too because she wants to get home with as much daylight as possible, but it’s already dark when she leaves and she wishes she had just talked with Hanayo longer.

 

She’s not the only orchestra member who rides the subway, but she doesn’t really know any of the others who do. There’s the man who plays bassoon, an older woman who plays viola, a pair of wind players who Eli thinks may be married. She’s talked to them a few times out of an impulse to make a connection with other queer women, and they were nice, but they get off the train earlier than her and are usually kind of in their own little world. Not quite as smooth sailing as Eli might have liked.

 

Because of this, the ride home is uneventful, if tense for Eli. The last time she did this, rode the late train and walked home, a man pulled her into an alley. She tries to comfort herself by saying lightning doesn’t strike twice, but she holds her pepper spray close and wishes she had a hard case for her violin. Maybe having something she could swing like a club would deter an assailant. The backpack case is convenient though, and she doesn’t want to hurt her violin, so Eli cuts her losses. Her fingers grip the canister tighter.

 

Eli is slow, but steady as she leaves the train and makes her way up the platform. Her palms are sweaty, and she tries to blame it on the hot subway station but she knows better. Her eyes are alert, sharp, as she climbs the stairs and pushes through the exit terminal. She gains momentum as she walks towards the steps to the outside world, and she gets ready to take them at a run when she finds her way blocked by a family bustling off the platform. It forces her to stop and wait and she loses her momentum as she hovers nervously behind them.

 

They make their way slowly up the stairs and Eli waits a few seconds, not wanting to follow too closely behind. Once the appropriate amount of time has passed, Eli looks up at the night sky above, a rectangle twenty steps above her, and falters. She reaches out to take the stair rail, but can’t seem to bring her hand down around it. She lifts her foot and it ghosts the first step before coming back down at her side. It’s well lit down here and there are people around. Up there…who knows.

 

Taking a deep breath, Eli decides to go at it again. She grips the rail this time and pulls herself up to the first step, then another, and another, and another, all the way to the top. There, though, she falters. Beyond the steps is the dark pavement, the shadowy streets . Here she’s still safe.

 

Fuck.

 

She’s gripping the rail white knuckled now, with her legs frozen, her eyes glued to the sky. Her chest is tight and she wants nothing more than to be  _ safe _ and  _ home _ —

 

“Looks like we just missed the rain.” A soft hand is laid on her upper arm and Eli whips around to see Nozomi standing at her elbow. Her mouth falls open in shock and she lets out a huff in disbelief.

 

“Nozomi?” Eli’s stunned. She’d resigned herself to never seeing this woman again, thought it was a missed opportunity. Instead, here was Nozomi, only a week later, smiling up at her, almost shy. Eli does a slow blink, trying to process everything, and as her eyes open her mouth curls into a smile. She laughs.

 

She must look at her for a moment too long because a flash of something almost uneasy crosses Nozomi’s face for a split second before it’s schooled away behind her smile. Eli looks down and shakes her head quickly to clear it. “Um, hi,” she says, still not quite believing Nozomi’s here. “What are you doing here?” All the fear from before is forgotten and Eli feels a little like she’s floating from the shock. It’s the nicest thing she’s felt all week.

 

Nozomi shrugs. “This is my stop. I live five blocks away.” She grins as Eli’s face lights up.

 

“This is my stop too! What a coincidence!” Eli tilts her head a little, thinking it over. “Well, it makes sense now that I think about it. You and Nico were in the area when… That night.” Her face falls. She remembers the fear she felt and hugs her good arm to her side. Her teeth start to worry her lip and she looks over her shoulder at the dark street. She knows she’s probably being rude, looking behind her, but she can’t tear her eyes away from the shadows and that just adds to her anxiety.

 

“Would you want to walk together?” That breaks Eli from her thoughts. She turns back around to find Nozomi looking at her with sympathy. She hugs her arm closer to her side and feels the anxiety rise for a different reason.

 

“I wouldn’t want to pull you out of your way…”

 

Nozomi waves the comment off with an easiness that suggests that it really isn’t a problem. “Don’t worry about it. Where do you live?”

 

Eli glances behind her, still slightly nervous about the whole thing, and jerks her thumb over her shoulder. “About four blocks that way, on Nelson.”  She clears her throat. “Um, where do you live?”

 

Nozomi points over Eli’s left shoulder. “About five blocks away, on Warren.” Oh. That wasn’t far away at all. Nozomi grins at her and Eli knows there’s no use in arguing this one. She smiles back and jerks her thumb over her shoulder.

 

“Then do you want to get going?”

 

Nozomi grips the handle of her purse. “Let’s go.”

 

Eli leads her towards the crosswalk next to the subway exit. It’s not the direction she pointed in, but she wants to avoid that...unfortunate section of alley, and if she has to go out of her way, so be it.

 

She’s a little giddy in the way the night has developed. What were the odds that she’d run into Nozomi again? She guesses they’d be a little higher now that she knows this is her stop too, but still.

 

She’s not complaining, though. They keep glancing at each other and laughing, like they can’t believe this crazy thing would happen, and it isn’t until they’re standing side by side, waiting for the light at the crosswalk, that Nozomi speaks.

 

“I guess you were telling the truth about being in the orchestra,” she says, patting Eli’s violin case goodnaturedly.

 

“Hmm? Oh, yeah,” Eli says. “We had a late practice today. Someone was using our space before us.” The light turns and they start walking.

 

Nozomi looks puzzled. “You don’t have a space that’s just for the orchestra?”

 

Eli shakes her head. “No, we rehearse in Fairview Hall downtown, and there was an early show today, so practice was pushed back.”

 

Nozomi nods. “That makes sense.” They reach the other side and step back up on the sidewalk, going straight. “What are you playing right now?” Nozomi asks. “Though I’ll warn you, I probably won’t know the pieces by name.”

 

Eli laughs. “It’s ok. Um, we’ve got a Bernstein piece, a Copland piece, a Gershwin piece, it’s a real modern concert we’re doing next. We also got the music for the next concert, which has more of a classical feel.”

 

Nozomi seems to think for a moment before nodding in understanding. “I took a music theory class in high school and this is the first time I’ve had to use it,” she says, grinning. They both laugh.

 

“I’m glad it’s finally paying off,” Eli says. “I guess you don’t listen to much classical music?”

 

Nozomi shakes her head. “No, I mostly listen to songs with words.”

 

“There are a lot of classical choral pieces,” Eli says, grinning, mostly to be a pain in the ass. They round the corner at the end of the block and keep walking.

 

Nozomi laughs. “You’re right, I should probably start adding Mozart to my playlists.”

 

Eli sees an opportunity and takes it. “You could add some Vivaldi too,” she says, barely able to contain her excitement, “but you know what they say.”

 

“What do they say?” Nozomi asks, amused.

 

“If it ain’t Baroque, don’t fix it.”

 

Nozomi bursts out laughing. “I don’t know what I expected,” she says, “but it wasn’t that. That was a good one.” Nozomi wipes at her eyes, sighing, and Eli feels a sense of pride well up.

 

The moment fades and Eli realizes she has nothing to follow that up with, so she hastily searches for a conversation thread. “So, what kind of music do you listen to?” she asks anxiously, trying to pace  it by the speed of their conversation. She actually does want to know this, it’s not like she’s just keeping up a conversation for conversation’s sake, she just doesn’t want Nozomi to think she’s awkward. 

 

“I like a lot of music,” Nozomi says. “The Killers, A-RISE, Hayley Kiyoko,” she gets a slight grin on her face, “that kind of thing.” She had looked up at the sky as she listed, but as she finishes she flashes that grin at Eli and Eli finds herself feeling…safe? Comfortable? She realizes how long she’s been without a friend and feels like if she’s not careful she’ll buckle into this feeling, just curl up in a ball and soak in the connection. Which would be unfortunate, because Nozomi will either think she’s weird or that she just needs saving  _ all the time. _

 

“How about you?” Nozomi asks her, and Eli breaks from her reverie. “What kind of music do you like?”

 

“Umm…” She thinks about it, looking off into the distance. “I actually really do like listening to classical music,” she says, “but I’m not picky when it comes to music. I like when there are good string parts, but I’ve also got some stuff like Florence and the Machine.” She turns to Nozomi. “My sister and I like Hayley Kiyoko,” she says with a grin. “She showed her to me and this summer, before I got this job, we would listen to her a lot while driving.”

 

“Sounds like you and your sister are close,” Nozomi says, turning forward. There’s something in her voice that Eli can’t place, and in the low lighting all she can see is that Nozomi has a half smile on her face. She almost sounds…sad. Or maybe wistful. 

 

“We are,” Eli says, trying to figure out what caused this shift in Nozomi. “Do you have any siblings?”

 

Nozomi shakes her head. “No, I’m an only child. But I’m close with Nicocchi’s siblings.” She flashes that grin at Eli again and her demeanor shifts back to what it was before. “The youngest sibling is 12 and the oldest is 16.” She tilts her head. “Well, I guess the oldest sibling is 27,” she says, laughing a little. “But Cocoro’s 16.”

 

“Does she just have two siblings?” Eli asks. Nozomi seems eager to talk about Nico’s family and happier than she was when she was saying she was an only child.

 

“No, Cocoa’s in between Cocoro and Cotorou,” she says. “So three siblings.” She smiles and holds up three fingers.

 

“They’ve all got similar names,” Eli says, laughing.

 

Nozomi nods. “They do. Nicocchi’s kind of the odd man out here.”

 

“My sister’s name is Alisa,” Eli says, “so I guess our names are similar, but not to the degree of Nico and her siblings.”

 

At that moment, they step off the sidewalk and onto the bricks of an alley. Eli does some quick spacial analysis and realizes it’s the same alley she had been in a week ago when… She shakes her head. It’s a different block, the dumpsters and fire escapes aren’t the same. And yet…

 

Eli is acutely aware of the alley in her periphery. She sees something move in the corner of her eye and jumps to face it, one hand on her pepper spray. What meets her eyes is a plastic bag, drifting in the wind. Her heart, which had jumped to her throat, slows and Eli breathes out a sigh of relief.

 

“Eli?” Nozomi’s voice is uncertain and Eli feels her cheeks heat up.

 

“I-I’m sorry,” she says, embarrassed. “I thought I saw something. I-I didn’t mean to startle you.” She wants to move, wants to continue walking, but if she turns her back on this alley… She feels frozen, torn between her fear and her common sense, and she knows she’s embarrassing herself in front of Nozomi.

 

In a move that takes most of her willpower, she moves her left foot, turning her body so she’s facing the sidewalk again, and starts walking, stiffly, out of the alley.

 

Nozomi walks with her, and though Eli doesn’t look at her, she can feel concern radiating off of her. Eli chances a glance behind her at the alley and is relieved to see that no one is following them. She does this every few steps, checking quickly over her shoulder, then a glance at Nozomi, then looking straight ahead. A few steps later, quick check over her shoulder, a glance at Nozomi, rinse, repeat.

 

After about three cycles of this, Nozomi cautiously extends the crook of her arm. Eli sees it out of the corner of her eye, then looks at her quizzically.

 

“Strength in numbers?” Nozomi offers.

 

Eli considers this, then, hesitantly, loops her arm with Nozomi’s.

 

“Sorry for…all that,” she says. “Guess it’s still on my mind.” It’s nice, walking arm in arm with Nozomi. Having someone right there is comforting, especially this new friend. She feels safer. Part of her still wants to turn around, but it’s a much smaller part, and she fights it. There’s nothing there in that alley, nothing but plastic bags and other trash.

 

“Of course it’s still on your mind,” Nozomi says. “It wasn’t that long ago.” She squeezes Eli’s arm. “It’s ok.”

 

Eli squeezes back for a moment and allows herself to close her eyes and breathe deeply. She feels calmer when she opens them again, more tired too. “Thank you,” she says.

 

“Any time.”

 

They walk in silence until the end of the block, when Eli cautiously asks how work is going. They make small talk the whole next block and it does wonders to normalize the night. At the corner, though, Eli pauses. “I live that way,” she tells Nozomi apologetically, pointing to the left.

 

Nozomi nods. “Ok then,” she says, and starts towards the direction Eli pointed in.

 

Eli stays still. “Didn’t you say that you lived the other way?” she asks.

 

Nozomi pauses, looking around. “You’re right,” she says, nodding, “but I can still walk you to your building, it won’t be too far out of my way.” She grins at Eli. “Probably.”

 

Eli nods. “It’s just on the next block.”

 

Nozomi frowns. “Aren’t we doubling back a little? We already crossed that street a few blocks back."

 

Eli looks away, blushing, and clears her throat. “I, um, wanted to avoid that spot where, um, the shit from last week happened.” She gives a wry laugh. “But I guess it turns out that any alley at night can set me off, so, sorry for taking you out of your way.”

 

“It’s ok, really.” Nozomi squeezes her arm again. “It’s not too far out of my way, and this has been a much more fun walk home than usual. Eli snorts in disbelief. “I mean it,” Nozomi says, and the sincerity in her voice makes Eli believe her.

 

“Alright,” she lets up. “Well, thank you then.” She starts to walk and notices a pleased look on Nozomi’s face as she follows. Most of the anxiety that she’s inconveniencing Nozomi fades away and Eli walks on in contentment.

 

They chat a little as they walk, but they’re mostly quiet as they approach Eli’s building. “This is where I live,” Eli says, pointing, and Nozomi nods. They extract their arms from one another and Eli blushes a little, thinking of how that must look. There’s nothing that says that two friends can’t walk home with linked arms, though, so she pushes that from her mind.

 

She stands there for a moment, unsure of how to end this. Abruptly, she sticks out her hand. “Thank you for walking me home,” she says. “It was really nice of you. I had a lot of fun.” The words feel stiff to her, and they must feel stiff to Nozomi too, because she holds back an amused smile, looking down at Eli’s hand.

 

She takes it in her own after a beat and gives it a firm shake. “Any time,” she says.

 

Eli hesitates. “Are you sure you’ll be ok walking back?” she asks.

 

Nozomi thinks for a minute, then carefully tugs her hand out of Eli’s. Eli pulls her hand back quickly, embarrassed to have forgotten she was holding it. “Let me give you my number,” she says, rifling through her purse for a moment before finding her phone. “I’ll text you when I get home.” She opens up her phone to the new contact page and holds it out to Eli, who puts her number in. “Besides, I can handle myself out there.” She grins and Eli nods, remembering.

 

“Yeah, your stun gun, I remember,” she says, smiling a little.

 

Nozomi frowns for a split second before remembering. “Yeah,” she says, “of course. Sorry, I’ve got pepper spray with me too.” She laughs a little as Eli hands her phone back to her. She fiddles around for a second before locking it. “Just texted you,” she says. A moment later, Eli’s phone buzzes.

“Awesome!” Eli says. “Thank you.”

 

“Of course,” Nozomi says, smiling. She turns to leave. “I’m going to head off now,” she says, waving. “Bye, Eli, it was good to see you again.”

 

“Bye!” Eli waves, and though she’s anxious for her friend to get home safe, she does believe that she can handle herself. Mostly, she’s just elated to have a friend. She watches Nozomi get to the end of the block before turning and going inside.

 

She’s only inside for about fifteen minutes before Nozomi texts her.

 

(10:37) Nozomi Toujou: Home safe! :)

 

Eli breathes out a sigh of relief.

 

(10:37) Eli Ayase: Glad to hear it! :)

 

She debates for a moment before sending the next message, not wanting to seem clingy.

 

(10:38) Eli Ayase: Would you want to hang out sometime?

 

She’s a little surprised by how quick the answer is.

 

(10:38) Nozomi Toujou: Sure!

(10:38) Nozomi Toujou: Do you have a plan in mind?

 

Eli bites her lip

 

(10:38) Eli Ayase: No, I don’t.

(10:38) Eli Ayase: I don’t really know what’s fun to do in this town, sorry!

(10:39) Nozomi Toujou: Hmm…

(10:39) Nozomi Toujou: Have you been to Homura yet?

(10:39) Eli Ayase: I haven’t!

(10:39) Eli Ayase: That’s the place you said was a must-see, right?

(10:39) Nozomi Toujou: A Queen City staple, yes! :)

(10:40) Nozomi Toujou: Would you like to go?

(10:40) Eli Ayase: Sure! :)

 

They decide on going next Tuesday around noon, since they both have to work in the evening that day. Eli wants to talk more, she likes talking to Nozomi, but she’s so tired and as luck would have it, tomorrow’s rehearsal is in the morning. So, reluctantly, she says goodnight to Nozomi and gets up to get ready for bed. 

 

Considering how anxious she’s been all day, she feels pretty calm right now. It feels good to have a friend, one she can really talk to. Eli thinks about that as she brushes her teeth. Part of her feels more alive than she has in a while, which she guesses makes sense. She snorts. Wow, she was really starved for friendship, wasn’t she.  _ And now I don’t have to be. _

 

Eli finishes brushing her teeth and finds she can’t wipe the grin off her face. She blushes. Well that’s a little embarrassing. Should she really place that much value on one night? That said, can she be bothered to care to care? She remembers Nozomi laughing at her dumb joke and feels that grin spread across her face again. God, she feels so dumb. She catches her eye in the mirror and feels her face heat up. “Shut up,” she tells herself, but hearing it just makes her giggle. She puts her toothbrush in the holder and heads out of the bathroom.

 

Eli figures she might as well let herself be happy as she changes into her pajamas. It’s been a while since she’s been this excited about anything, let alone anyone, and really, she’s needed something like this. She takes a deep breath and just lets herself be consumed by the feeling. She exhales. The sleepy feeling she felt before comes flooding back into her bones and she suddenly feels like she’s going to fall asleep on her feet. Tiredly, she crosses the room to turn off the main light, then crawls into bed, a smile on her face.

 

She sleeps well for the first time in a week. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew this chapter got long! I borrowed Midori from Hibike! Euphonium, and she's not the only Hibike person in this fic or even this chapter, so keep your eyes peeled!
> 
> If you enjoyed this chapter, please comment and leave kudos! It's fun writing this story, but it makes it a lot easier when I have encouragement. :)


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